THE McORGY
I’m an American.
Now, the stereotype about Americans would have you believe that we are all lazy, stupid and fat. Not one to let a classic die, I decided to keep that idea fresh in the mind of the world. I was inspired yesterday to create a monstrosity of meaty magnitude that no one had ever seen or eaten, as it were, as the creation in question was a sandwich of epic proportions!
First, a little back story…
There is a website called, This is Why You’re Fat, which is a site that shows-off a bunch of food items that were created by various people that give a whole new meaning to the term, “going overboard.” Well, one of the items on the site peaked the interest of my two friends who sought to re-create it in all its gluttonous glory.
It’s called the McGangBang.
It consists of a McChicken sandwich stuffed in between the two beef patties of a double cheeseburger from McDonalds.
Now, my two friends recreated this sandwich and I congratulated them on their delicious success. However, I admit to not being satisfied by this turn of events. To me, while the McGangBang is an impressive and creative accomplishment, I felt like it could be pushed even further to create something even better. Or worse.
You see, I figured that while it was great to have a chicken sandwich and a hamburger all rolled up into one, representing a chicken and cow respectively, there was still room for other animals to be represented. Isn’t it every meat-loving person’s dream to be able to eat all animals at once? I know it’s mine! That’s when I remembered that McDonalds also has a Filet O’ Fish sandwich. I mean, how can you forget about it when a damn commercial won’t get out of your head? (Gimmie back that Fillet of Fish, gimmie that…damn it!)
So, with that, a fish had also been added to the equation. However, I didn’t stop there. I figured, what would a sandwich be without bacon? Nothing, that’s what! However, to my dismay, the only sandwich offered by McDonalds that has any bacon in it is their stupid BLT sandwich. See? This is why I don’t like McDonalds and prefer other establishments. The Bacon Factor. Step up your game, McDonalds! You’re just lucky I went to your restaurant. After all, if I didn’t, I certainly could not call the sandwich the McOrgy!
So, yeah, not being satisfied enough with just adding fish to the mix I decided that I needed to add a pig; namely bacon. Now, you might be asking, why did I grab a bag of real bacon bits and not strips of pre-cooked bacon or even raw bacon? Easy. I’m lazy. Who has time to cook bacon? Also, pre-cooked bacon is too small and tastes horrible. Bacon bits, however? Delicious.
Once all my ingredients were assembled I played doctor and tore open the double cheeseburger and gave it about 100CCs of bacon bit goodness! Now this sandwich had four animals to contend with: cow, chicken, fish and pig! Oh my, have mercy!
The next part was simple enough: stick the McChicken and the Filet O’ Fish, buns and all, between the two halves of the double cheeseburger. Thus creating, what I have dubbed…
THE McORGY
I can’t believe I ate the whole thing…
